taking the viola plunge...

so I finally womaned up and took the plunge -- tonight I took out the viola for the first serious playing since 2005 (except for the one evening spent recording tracks in '06).  The idea had obviously been percolating for awhile. After much debate, I decided to at least take out my viola and see if it was even functional anymore. After all, it'd been sitting in the corner of my room for the past several years and had been through so many hot-cold / cold-hot weather changes that I was worried the wood may have cracked or the seams may have let go. (not to mention the strings haven't been changed since August '05, and my bow hasn't been rehaired in an equally long time)  Amazingly, everything was intact, aside from a few hairs dangling off the tip of the bow.

So I decided to tune up my viola and quickly test how quietly the heavy practice mute would let me play (to see if the eventual viola playing would even be reasonable in my apartment). Admittedly the tone with the practice mute sucks, but it gets the job done.  I thought about stopping after tuning up and calling it a night... but I felt compelled to see what I could do.  Terrified of what the outcome might be, I pulled out my old (and I mean OLD) etude books from early in my viola studies, turned to the first pages, and tentatively started to play.

The first few notes were squeaky, mostly from being shaky-nervous. my initial thought was "holy crap, I'm so out of practice" as I felt the muscles in my hands and arms tense. I forgot how many muscles are needed for position-shifting etudes and different bowing styles. I forced through the squeaks and noticed that things were starting to come back to me. I hadn't forgotten how to read music. I hadn't forgotten how to shift from one position to another. I hadn't forgotten what the different articulation markings meant. and I kept playing.

Somehow an hour passed and I was still playing. my hands, arms, and back are incredibly sore and tense, but in some ways, it's the best feeling in the world. I finally jumped over the initial hurdle, and I realized that to an extent, my hands still remember what they're supposed to do. I'm hoping if I spend the next few months working through the various etudes books I have kicking around, that maybe this summer I can reasonably get back into some of my old concertos, etc.

I'm nowhere near where I was at the peak of my viola "career", but my hope is that if I did it once, I can do it again. The music is somewhere inside of me -- it has been all this time -- I just need to work my ass off to unleash it again.

(p.s. thanks to jacob, pete, alison, and carolyn for helping me get over my fear and reconnect with my viola!)